Surviving
Divorce: What To Think About To Ensure Surviving Divorce
By
Karl
Augustine
Surviving
divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating getting a divorce. In
order to ensure surviving divorce, you should first understand that your
divorce decision shouldn't be taken lightly. Ensuring that you'll be surviving
divorce can be comforting and can influence your path as you consider your
reasons for divorce and take the emotional plunge into actually going through
with it.
Its
tough enough to think about how your immediate life will be impacted by getting
a divorce let alone thinking about divorce from an aspect of "the aftermath"
of divorce. You may be considering a variety of things in the short term
including living arrangements, spouse's schedules, attorneys, kids, property,
etc. Its tough to plan so you can really ensure that you'll be surviving
divorce once its finally over with.
Surviving
divorce, just like deciding to divorce, is about separating emotion from
logic and making sure you think about the past, present and future. Of course,
how you plan for surviving divorce, will differ from others in some respects,
but there are some common themes to think about that should ensure you will
be successful surviving divorce.
The
most common things to think about when you want to be successful surviving
divorce are self-evident and basic, but highly important:
Surviving
Divorce Concept 1: Reflect on the past to make sure you can eliminate potential
regret.
Make
sure that you take the time to reflect on the past and remember the reasons
that got you to this state of mind. One thing you absolutely must avoid is
going through a divorce and regretting your decision. Evaluate, in detail,
your reasons for divorce and confirm to yourself yet again that divorce is
the best course of action. This will help eliminate regret...and regret can
be a large factor in determining your chance of surviving
divorce.
Surviving
Divorce Concept 2: Admit to yourself that, no matter how your situation got
to this breaking point of wanting divorce, that you had a hand in it, and
plan to improve yourself.
Even
if you know your present spouse is not a good fit for you, be smart enough
to know that you shouldn't waste the opportunity that you have right now
to improve yourself, for your own good in the future. At a time like this
when emotions are running high, there tends to be a lot of soul searching
going on, and that's a good thing if you want to ensure that you've got a
solid chance of surviving divorce. Realize that you need to improve for you,
this will only help you in the future. Remember, it takes two to
tango!
Surviving
Divorce Concept 3: Remember that your happiness and plan for surviving divorce
should include evaluating and establishing a certain level of self-confidence.
Having self confidence is absolutely critical to surviving divorce because
without it, fear usually will win out and your situation will not improve.
Even if you get divorced but you don't evaluate your own level of self confidence
in the hopes of improving it, you may be in for a rough time after divorce.
If you want a sure-fire way to feel good about surviving divorce, do yourself
a favor and get your self-confidence in line.
If
your overall confidence and desire to start over with your love life support
making a change, you're off to a good start in making a smart decision about
whether to divorce or not.
Surviving
Divorce Concept 4: Get your finances in a row and understand that your life
will change most likely from a monetary perspective.
This
is a major portion of the surviving divorce equation, especially for women
in divorce. A lot of time, women in divorce situations have to deal with
finance issues and they fear going out on their own because they've had financial
support previously. Still, this concept is not gender specific and can resonate
with anyone because, one some level, your life will change financially as
a result of divorce...that's a guarantee. In order to make sure your chance
at surviving divorce is high, you need to be willing to trade potential financial
loss to get a divorce. If you're willing to do this, maybe you're ready to
really take the big step.
Surviving
Divorce Concept 5: Understand the true value of using "projection" to ensure
surviving divorce.
This
is a terrific exercise to go through when you're faced with a divorce decision
and want to ensure you've got a great chance of surviving divorce. "Projection"
simply means looking to the future and actually imagining what your life
will be like once you're divorced. And, if you're smart, you'll see multiple
scenarios of what your life will become after divorce and you'll be able
to pin down which factors lead to each one of those scenarios. Then, choose
the scenario you'd like to actually live, and take the necessary steps needed
to implement those factors. This one of the most important practices to ensure
that you're chances of surviving divorce are high.
Surviving
divorce is a difficult thing but it can easily be accomplished if you plan,
reflect, think, and execute based on your own goals and needs.
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